My Life Is So Different Now

I have had a bit of difficulty with inspiration and motivation when it comes to blogging and just life in general recently, but I now have reasons to carry on, enough to keep me going for quite some time.

I am kind of seriously overfilled with joy right now, so much so that I have been smiling for the past two days like crazy, and people have definitely noticed. Someone said they might have to start calling me ‘Smiles’. This positive attitude I now have has transformed the person I am and I feel like a different person. It’s wonderful!

Do you want to know why?

I hope you do, otherwise this post would be a waste of time.

Actually no i wouldn’t, because I can look at it and elect on one of the greatest experiences I have ever had, if not the greatest of all time. Before I start I want to just say that not everyone will agree with my views and values but that is fine. I just ask that you respect my decision.

Anyway, let’s just move straight on to this because I am excited (over the top excitable).

I work voluntarily at a cafe in my local area, which is run by people from different churches. The idea was to bring people in the community together, and it really has, and continues to do so. Such a lovely place to be.

Whilst being there, I have been open to Christian ideas, and due to being a very curious person, I found myself joining the Alpha Course which was being hosted there. It was a way of exploring Christianity further and to ask any questions I may have had regarding the religion.

Throughout the weeks I have definitely been one of the most vocal on the table I was allocated (the young table), and ended up being told that sometimes I delve too deep into things, and that not every question needs a physical answer. At first I had no absolutely idea what they meant until I attended the away day.

This is where it gets good. This was the day that has changed my life completely, and one I will remember for years to come.

The day went amazingly. I wasn’t even going to go originally but I am so glad I did.

We watched three videos, all relating to the idea of the Holy Spirit and how it can touch you and how you can feel it. I was rather unsure to begin with, but as the day went on, and the more we discussed it, the more I was starting to get it.

Towards the end, we were singing hymns, most of which I didn’t know, so I was just trying to take in the words as best I could. This was the moment that will never leave me.

Ready? I am!

My heart was beating so fast, which at first I thought was just another anxiety attack, but it was different in feeling to what I have had before. There was a warmth in my chest, but at the same time I was shivering like mad, and out of nowhere I became very teary. I couldn’t explain why either. For the rest of the day there was a smile on my face, the same one that hasn’t left me since. It was the weirdest feeling in the world, but also one of the most special moments. I loved it. I even felt I was ready to say the prayer which brings you closer to God. An acceptance if you will.

Just awesome!

I’m so sorry this was so rambly and over the top. I just thought it would be great (I keep saying great) to tell you and share. Oh and like I said this was my decision and I am not asking Christianity in your face, just updating on my life.

Also, I would like to thank LΒ for nominating me for Blog of the year. It really helped keep me in this awesomely positive mood. I can’t believe you would think I am good enough for such an acknowledgment. Thank you.

See you all soon!

Chloe Lauren x