Hey Guys,
As you might be aware, I have had my fair share of toxic friendships, even up to quite recently, so I thought I would give you signs to look out for, which will show you if you are in the wrong friendship. I just don’t want you to be in the same position I have been in for a few years. I hope this helps!
Betrayal Of Trust:
You can put as much effort and trust as possible into a friendship, and then within a few seconds have it all ruined because the other person lets you down and betrays you in some way or another. It hurts! I know!
You Begin To Fear Or Become Anxious Whenever They Are Around:
I never used to have anxiety until I became friends with someone who ruined me. Anytime I saw them, or felt like they were going to get angry with me, I would become frightened. Some people thought it was weird that I could be afraid of someone, but they clearly have no idea what it’s like to be in that position.
Manipulate Your Feelings:
There was one person in my life who always knew the right things to say to make me feel like something she did, was completely my fault and I made her do it. I was being conditioned to apologise for things I hadn’t done, to the point that I just say sorry now just in case.
Picking Out Every Little Flaw You Have:
I think I mentioned this last week, but I had someone who would always pick out whatever problems I had, and make me feel as though what I was, was wrong. It made me go from super confident, to what I am now, afraid of what people will think. No one should ever have the power to control how you see yourself.
They Make Your Achievements Seem Small:
Any achievement, even those that seem small, are actually not. If you have done something which deserves mentioning, then a true friend will tell you how brilliant it is, but someone who is a toxic friend, will not because it’s not about them. If you have an achievement, you should be able to feel great about it, and not worried about how they react to it.
These are not all of the signs, but if you can relate to any of these, I would begin to re evaluate the friendships you currently hold. I stayed with mine for 4 years, because I was too afraid. Leaving was the best thing I ever did! Sure, there is pain afterwards, but that can be fixed, staying would make it worse.
Ohhh thank you so much for this. The first one is one I have with a friend, and the second too; I’ve also had the others with different people over the years.
LikeLiked by 1 person
I am glad I did this, especially if it helps someone! Oh and I am really sorry that you fit into a few of these with friends. I hate the feeling! Oh and look at you with over 1000 followers, that is an achievement someone can’t bring down π Elm you’re the best π
LikeLiked by 1 person
I’M the best? YOU’RE amazing, let me tell you now! π
LikeLiked by 1 person
Aww thank you!!! This is why we are friends π
LikeLiked by 1 person
YES exactly! π
LikeLiked by 1 person
WOOOO! TeamAwesome all the way haha! π
LikeLiked by 1 person
YASSS!
LikeLiked by 1 person
π
LikeLiked by 1 person
So many people (me included) needed this post so much. Thanks. βΊοΈ
LikeLiked by 2 people
I am glad! I just want to help people (hopefully) π
LikeLiked by 1 person
You did and will. I can tell.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thanks for the positivity!!! Haha π
LikeLiked by 1 person
It’s odd I’m normally a really negative person. Lolπ
LikeLiked by 1 person
When it comes to your comments on my blog you are not! HAHA!
LikeLiked by 1 person
True I try to keep it upbeat online. Haha lol
LikeLiked by 2 people
Well I appreciate it, but it’s also ok to share your true feelings if that ever helps π
LikeLiked by 2 people
I have been in that position for almost 7 years but now I have good friends that i love β€
LikeLiked by 2 people
Ahh ok! Well it’s however you see it really π
LikeLiked by 1 person
‘Friends’ can really hurt you and pick out things which you hate about yourself
LikeLiked by 1 person
Oh I know! They can even pick out things you originally liked about yourself, and over time, make you hate it. People can be mean!
LikeLiked by 1 person
Yup!
LikeLiked by 1 person
This is such a useful post! This could help so many people π
LikeLiked by 2 people
I hope it does! I just thought I would share my experiences and hope it makes a difference with someone π
LikeLiked by 2 people
Its great π
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thanks βΊ
LikeLiked by 1 person
If anyone is interested and if it’s okay with you, Chloe. I wrote a blog post a few months ago about this and it has hotline numbers for the US, UK, and other nations. You can find it here. https://thoughtsofhomes.wordpress.com/2015/07/24/haircuts-a-memoir-of-letting-go/
LikeLiked by 1 person
No that’s perfectly fine π That will really help people! Thanks for telling me.
LikeLiked by 1 person
No problem. π I really enjoy your posts and really resonate with this one and knew I had some phone numbers and websites that could help.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thank you! Sometimes I really doubt my posts are any good, so that means a lot. Oh and yes!
LikeLiked by 1 person
OMG so true!!! You’re so wise, like how?? I really needed this post, thank you for this!!!! XD XD AWESOME!!! This could help lot of people!!!
LikeLiked by 1 person
*a lot of people
LikeLike
Aww thanks girl! That means a lot. I’m not wise. I just have had experience and hope to help people with them.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Yes you’re wise, believe me!! XD And no problem!
LikeLiked by 1 person
Oh I will have to take your word for it haha!
LikeLiked by 1 person
I am so glad you left your toxic friend, and posted this because I know this will help give people the confidence to be like “you know what, I don’t need you in my life cause you’re holding me back.”
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thank you! I have had a few in my time, because I find it difficult to leave! That’s why I wanted to show people the signs! Hopefully it helps π
LikeLiked by 1 person
Sadly I feel most people get caught up in toxic relationships at one point in their life whether they realise it or not. Thankfully we have amazing bloggers like you raising awareness! I’m so glad you’ve found the strength and courage to leave – awesomeness on your part
LikeLiked by 1 person
Oh I know! Some people don’t even realise the power their words will have on others. Aww thank you!!! Oh and I recently had another friend like it, who, yet again, I apologised to instead of them saying sorry to me!
LikeLiked by 1 person
I know right – wouldn’t it be amazing to wake up one day to a button which you can press which will erase all negativity, and manipulative actions?! Aw, well that just shows what a bigger person you are to apologise when it isn’t even your fault.
LikeLiked by 1 person
That would be the most perfect invention! Oh and maybe, but at the same time I feel like an idiot for giving in to them once again!
LikeLiked by 1 person
i guess i dont have friends like this, or maybe i’m too blind to notice. But i’m glad to find a post like this. most of the time, people would post about “5 signs you’re in a toxic relationship” and they somehow just forget about how important friendships are. I’m glad you did this !
LikeLiked by 1 person
I hope you don’t have friends like that, but if you do, it’s just about figuring out where the problem is, and working out your next step. Oh I know what you mean! Friendships can have as much of a hold on you as a relationship with someone can. Thank you π
LikeLiked by 1 person
So true! I had several toxic friendship I then had to end. This was sometimes really difficult. I’ve just published a post about breaking up with a toxic friend.
http://afortnightaway.com/2016/03/04/breaking-up-with-a-friend/
LikeLiked by 1 person
Oh! I hate feeling trapped in then, but when you leave you begin to feel empowered. Oh I will check that out later on! π
LikeLiked by 1 person
Wow! Is your toxic friend my toxic friend? Because I dealt with the same problems as you. I’m sorry you went through that. I’ll never understand how someone can treat another person that way.
LikeLike